With the public people in the public places publicly.

Why?  Because working with “The GP” gives me tourettes.  Now, I’m not playin’ y’all.  I’m not saying that to be mean to tourettes sufferers.  And I’m not just saying that because some tourettes sufferers say curse words or inappropriate things.  No, when I’m out with these people, I have other issues.  Tics.  Things I can’t control.

Maybe I have social anxiety.  But I’m not really that way around other situations....just when I’m working.  I have work tourettes.

Examples:

* I see someone walking down the aisle and I say to them, “Hi!  Are you finding everything okay?” Now y’all should know by now that I do not give two shits about whether they’re finding things okay.  It just comes out of my mouth without me even knowing until it is out.

* I walk up to the counter and I smile. WTF?  I KNOW SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH ME.  I DON’T SPONTANEOUSLY SMILE AT PEOPLE EVER. 

* I’ll help a customer and be all smiley, selling, selling, smile, smile, thanks, smile, smile, have a great day, smile, smile.  Then I turn around and I feel like my head is going to explode unless I make a face that tells other around me just how much I fucking hate “The GP.”

* If someone asks me for something that I don’t really want to do or asks me to go somewhere that I don’t want to go, I curse (you KNEW cursing was going to show up eventually, right?)...I curse enough to make a sailor blush.

So you see, there is no way that I should be allowed out in public.  I never know how I’ll react to the ignorance of some people. Some people make my eye twitch.  Some people make me spontaneously smile.  And if you know a SINGLE THING about me, you’ll know that I AM NOT LIKE THAT EVER.  That both an eye twitch and a smile are, in my book, equally horrifying.  I’m pretty sure I need to be medicated.